I wasn't happy in my relationship, I kept saying that I'm not supposed to be happy with a relationship, but on my own, that sounded reasonable at the time, and I felt awfully bad each time I got into a depression. I thought that I'm failing miserabelly at making myself happy.
I used to think that my partner doesn't owe me anything, that he isn't supposed to do for me anything. Thinking this way, made me be the only one putting in the effort, I was the only one calling him, the only one saying sorry even when it wasn't my fault... But as soon as I stopped putting in the effort, there where no more relationship.
Relationships isn't only about effort, sometimes you don't have to try too hard, you just can't force it, sometimes no matter how much you try, it won't make a difference, if the love isn't a true one.
Then I finally realized that, nothing would ever change, he's not going to change, he has been like that since the beginning, I don't know what I was thinking when I thought that he might change, and things will get better. He kept promising me, only to break those promises and break me as well. I know that people change, but change happens by exception, you can't expect someone else to change, it's whether you accept him the way he is or leave. And I should have left since the first months.
In the morning after breaking up, I felt something something different, I wanted to stay in bed, not because I lost excitement about life like I used to feel before, but because I still need some sleep, and I found it much easier to fall asleep than ever before. I got happy again!
Ain't nothing wrong with wanting true love, we all deserve it; don't let someone who didn't love you, hold you from the one who will. You don't deserve pain, you don't deserve sadness, you deserve a man who'll love you for who you are, respect you and treat you well.
If someone is making you miserable walk away from him, that's what i've learned! A partner that is not willing to put in the effort and make the relationship work, isn't worth keeping, a realtionship is a work of two or nothing at all.
So let your relationship be a motivation, a source of strength, to give you hope whenever time gets tough but never let it be a source of stressing. So make sure that your partner is someone who is going to lift you, and not make you miserable, who is going to inspire you and motivate you to bring out your best.
"Find someone who will change your life, not just your status."